


Jukebox

by Amethystina



Category: The Losers (2010)
Genre: Jensen likes to serenade Cougar with various songs, M/M, So basically the soundtrack of their evolving relationship, brief mentions of injuries, or something
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-10-17
Updated: 2015-10-17
Packaged: 2018-04-26 18:50:40
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,989
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5016148
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Amethystina/pseuds/Amethystina
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Cougar understands early on that Jensen loves to sing. Most of the time he does it for fun, trying to pass the time or because he has a song stuck in his head, but on other occasions the lyrics Jensen sings have actual meaning. Over the course of their relationship, Cougar learns to listen to the words Jensen is trying to say, even if his way of expressing them might be somewhat unconventional.</p><p>Then again, that's Jensen in a nutshell, isn't it?</p>
            </blockquote>





	Jukebox

**Author's Note:**

> [Morozovasraven](http://morozovasraven.tumblr.com/) pointed out that Joe Cocker's "You Can Leave Your Hat On" is the kind of song Jensen would probably dance to, and since I wholeheartedly agreed I decided to expand on that, and write a story centered around the songs Jensen sings to/in front of Cougar. [Morozovasraven](http://morozovasraven.tumblr.com/) picked "You Can Leave Your Hat On", [CarpeDentum](http://archiveofourown.org/users/CarpeDentum) demanded "Call Me Maybe" and "You're My Best Friend", and I picked the last four that aren't "Don't Stop Believin'" (which had to be included, duh)
> 
> I want to point out that the timeline doesn't actually work ("Call Me Maybe" was released _after_ the The Losers movie) but let's just ignore that, okay? Again, this was written back in February and posted on Tumblr but not here on AO3. You can find the original post [HERE](http://amethystinawrites.tumblr.com/post/110654823632/jukebox), where you also have links to all of the songs.

 

_1\. Carly Rae Jepsen – Call Me Maybe_

Cougar considered himself to be a fairly levelheaded and dependable person, who was rarely brought out of balance or taken by surprise. It was difficult to rattle him and he faced most challenges with ruthless, unflinching determination. That was quite useful in his profession — not to mention appreciated by his superiors. But when the new tech specialist assigned to their team began their acquaintance by serenading him with "Call Me Maybe", even Cougar froze in complete and utter bewilderment. Which he was well within his rights to do, under the circumstances.

Sergeant Jacob Jensen was an original from the very moment he swaggered into their first briefing, all bright blue eyes, beaming smiles, and spiky blond hair. He was happily blurting out whatever nonsense that seemed to come to mind, and instead of walking resorted to bouncing excitedly on the balls of his feet. He looked more like an overgrown child than a trained soldier, but Cougar knew better than to question orders and decided to keep his mouth shut. Considering how rare it was for him to speak in the first place, it wasn't that big of a challenge.

But it became more and more difficult not to complain when Jensen proved to be just as hyperactive and loud when they shipped out. If Jensen continued on the same high-speed track he might even endanger the mission.

Cougar felt understandably worried.

His doubts only grew when Jensen started singing to himself while fiddling with the gadgets he had been given for the upcoming mission. While his fingers were kept busy — confident, long, and surprisingly graceful fingers — it was clearly not enough to distract what Cougar was beginning to realize was a frighteningly sharp mind, working in almost constant overdrive. It was as if Jensen needed at least two things, preferably three, to focus on, before he could balance and centre himself. Only then could he keep everything level and somewhat stable.

So while his mind had to be whirling with facts concerning the upcoming mission and his hands checked and double checked his equipment, he obviously felt a need to keep his mouth occupied as well. And the result of that was that he started singing.

To be honest, it wasn't _that_ bad. Jensen had a nice voice, all things considered, and when he wasn't making a show out of it the sound of his soft humming was actually rather comforting — if a bit distracting. His song choices were confusing mainly because of the variety, but at least it meant they didn't have to listen to the same song ten times in a row.

Cougar couldn't help wondering if he did requests, but he batted the thought away before it even took hold. He was _not_ going to encourage Jensen's behavior.

Then again, the singing seemed to calm Jensen down, or maybe the excitement from meeting his new team was finally beginning to settle. He looked almost peaceful by the time they touched ground.

Cougar realized — rather reluctantly, he might add — that in the moments when Jensen wasn't going a mile a minute, he was actually rather captivating. Still intense, yes, but the more he calmed down the more dependable he became. Maybe the first bursts of excess energy had been nerves or just genuine delight at meeting new people. As soon as the seriousness of the situation seemed to penetrate Jensen's thick skull, however, Cougar found himself less worried about the sergeant's coming performance.

He wasn't disappointed.

Jensen's explosive energy should possibly be considered a hazardous, lethal weapon — unstoppable as it was — but he put it to good use. In the chaos of the ensuing firefight his mind stayed razor sharp and focused, without getting distracted or derailed, and Cougar really couldn't ask for more than that in a teammate. Despite the flimsy, spastic outer layer Jensen's core was as firm and unyielding as Cougar's. So if Jensen needed to gesture as he spoke or skip while he walked to get an outlet for all that crackling, brilliant energy when he _wasn't_ giving his all during a mission, well, Cougar could accept that.

Jensen was a good soldier when it mattered.

Still, having Jensen — sweaty, bouncy, and high as a kite on post-mission adrenaline — burst into song, proclaiming how he and Cougar had just met, and it was crazy, but could he call him maybe?

Yeah, that would still take a while to get used to.

And Cougar wasn't even going to acknowledge the saucy wink Jensen gave him after his serenade.

The man was clearly insane.

 

_2\. Queen – You're My Best Friend_

In the many months since Cougar had gotten to know Jensen, he had learned that the only reasonable thing to do was to expect everything — not just the unexpected, but literally everything. Jensen had no filters and there were no limits to the outrageous things he wanted to do, or at the very least give a decent try, managing more or less successfully. Mostly less.

All in all, though, it was pretty endearing. Sometimes it was difficult to predict what Jensen would find worthy of his time, but he always gave it his all.

Like that one time he spent a week trying out every single recipe in the cookbook Cougar's mother sent them, complete with an in depth review of each and a complex grading system that required colorful graphs and a couple of pie charts. He didn't have to — Cougar tried to point this out more than once during said week — but Jensen insisted, because he wanted to show how much he appreciated Cougar's mother's concern for their well-being and nutrition intake.

There might have been more to it than that, but Cougar chose not to ask. Mostly because he suspected that it would only make his already painfully tight chest constrict even further. It was from gratefulness and fondness, sure, but it was so overwhelming that it hurt.

Jensen had that effect on him sometimes.

Either way, Cougar made sure to speak to his mother once she had received the almost inch-thick report Jensen sent her in return, and her reaction — after having confirmed that Jensen was in fact not deranged or in danger of a mental breakdown — was that he was clearly a keeper.

Cougar pointed out that while Jensen might have _tried_ every recipe, he hadn't necessarily succeeded in making them even remotely edible. His mother replied that the effort Jensen had put into it and the devotion he had shown was more than enough to prove him worthy in her eyes.

Cougar couldn't exactly argue with that.

Nor did he protest when his mother declared that he must bring Jensen next time he returned home, so that the nice, young man could taste some of those dishes when they were in fact properly prepared. Jensen didn't stop smiling for _days_ after Cougar forwarded the news, and it came as no surprise when Jensen proceeded to charm his way past Mrs. Alvarez's usually stern defenses and straight into her heart. Those innocent blue eyes of his were _lethal_ , and if Jensen hadn't already been way too old for such a thing, she would no doubt have insisted on adopting him.

Then again, she practically did so anyway, lacking only the official papers to prove it.

All of this — and every single one of Jensen's pranks, quirks, and general personality — meant that Cougar wasn't the least bit surprised when Jensen wanted to have a go when they happened to stumble in during karaoke night at one of the bars they frequented. He was practically thrumming with excitement and Cougar braced himself for Jensen's famous, if feared, rendition of "Eye of the Tiger". Or maybe he would go for "Poker Face" this time.

To Cougar's surprise — and secret delight — Jensen decided to curb his usually exuberant nature and need for constant recognition, and picked a completely different song. It didn't take many seconds before Cougar realized which one it was and, consequentially, that it was for him. Jensen's habit of serenading Cougar hadn't ended with "Call Me Maybe", but he had never done it publicly before. So maybe it was a good thing that Jensen had the brains and decency not to pick something lewd, even just for the laughs.

Fact was that it was sweet. Genuine. The lyrics were simple yet effective, and boldly affectionate in a way that suited Jensen rather nicely. And while Jensen did give Cougar several dorky grins as he sang about loving him and them being best friends, he didn't make a big show out of it.

He always sang better when he didn't.

Roque might have groaned and Clay shook his head at Jensen's antics, but Cougar quite enjoyed having a song dedicated to him. Especially one that was meant to celebrate their friendship; it was one of the things that Cougar held most dear, after all.

Pooch caught the fond smile Cougar wasn't quite able to hold back — even though he tried — but only grinned and took another sip of his beer, remaining graciously silent.

Cougar wasn't one of those who hooted and whistled once Jensen finished, but he did offer his applause, and couldn't quite stop smiling for the rest of the night. He sat there with a warm feeling of contentment in his chest and Jensen's thigh pressing comfortingly against his own, grounding and real.

And next time Cougar spoke to his mom he assured her, wholeheartedly, that he had every intention of keeping Jensen for as long as he was allowed.

 

_3\. Edith Newlin – Warm Kitty (rendered as Soft Kitty and popularized by The Big Bang Theory)_

The first time Jensen sang his own rendition of "Soft Kitty" — thereafter known as "Soft Cougar" — he did so in the living room in their shared house on base, with the single purpose of goading Cougar into a reaction. Cougar knew this since he had forbidden Jensen from pranking Roque earlier that day, and that usually left Jensen in a juvenile enough mindset to try something even _he_ would usually find childish.

They were best friends and Cougar was not a babysitter. Jensen should be able to accept a reprimand without sulking like a five-year-old.

Not that Cougar took a whole lot of offence to being referred to as a soft, warm, happy, or sleepy — or a sneaky ball of fur for that matter — but he did have something against Jensen's choice to do so in front of the whole team.

And the unmistakable edge of defiance to his otherwise innocent singing.

Jake _wanted_ Cougar to get annoyed and, by God, it worked. Cougar knew that he was supposed to be better than that, but when Jensen started on the third repeat — after having purred unnecessarily loud and the end of the second go — Cougar slapped the back of Jensen's head with his hat.

It shut him up rather quickly.

And if Jensen looked wounded and betrayed, well, he only had himself to blame.

The second time Jensen sang "Soft Cougar" his voice was near breaking, soft and hushed in the sterile hospital room, his fingers desperately clutching Cougar's. He sat there — despite how exhausted he must have been after their latest, near catastrophic, mission — his presence faithful and grounding. Cougar wasn't even fully conscious, still drugged up from his surgery and reeling from the pain and various medications pumped into his system.

But he could felt gentle, trembling fingers brush stray strands of hair from his face.

And he heard Jensen sing.

Cougar didn't mind it all that much, that second time.

 

_4\. Journey – Don't Stop Believin'_

What few people understood about Jensen was that underneath all the geeky t-shirts and bright smiles he was stunningly intelligent. He might not always show it, but there was nothing wrong with Jensen's ability to improvise and he often reached conclusions and solutions long before the rest of the team could even hope to do so, especially if it concerned math. Jensen's brain was a frightening thing and Cougar couldn't help admiring it whenever he got to see it in action.

Like when Jensen went to infiltrate Goliath.

Pooch might have jokingly referred to it as them watching Jensen get himself killed, but it wasn't that far from the truth. Or, more correctly: that could have been the case, if Jensen had been less resourceful.

Most people wouldn't even think twice about it, but Cougar knew that most things Jensen did — weird as they might seem at first glance — had a reason. So when Jensen bursts into Goliath's headquarters in his bright red shorts and yellow polo shirt, singing to his heart's content, it wasn't just because Jensen liked to sing.

Fact was, Cougar hadn't heard Jensen sing once since Bolivia. At most he had been humming under his breath, but he only ever got a couple of notes in before he stopped again, just as suddenly as he had started.

No, Jensen sang because he knew that no respectable business man or woman — with their pressed suits and expensive briefcases — would want to get into the same elevator as him if he did. The entire infiltration relied on Jensen being able to change outfits in an empty elevator, and while Clay had given him no pointers on how to achieve that, Jensen clearly didn't need any.

Because Jensen, weird and overexcited as he might be, knew what he was doing.

And Cougar couldn't help being almost embarrassingly proud of him, to a point where he wished that he could tell his mother about it, because he knew that she would agree. But she was out of Cougar's reach for the time being — hopefully not forever — and he chose to stay focused on the mission instead.

And that obviously included fulfilling Jensen long-living dream of appearing to be a telekinetic, if only for a brief moment. Cougar would be lying if he said that he wasn't enjoying himself too, just a tiny bit.

Jensen's creativity, slanting towards geeky references as it might be, was a joy to watch. Not to mention surprisingly effective at times, like having the third guard surrender without further arguments, all thanks to a ludicrously over the top scare tactic.

Jensen was amazing and Cougar tried to tell himself, very firmly, that the flutter he felt in his chest was nothing to worry about. Whatever jolt of attraction he might feel as soon as they touched was just his imagination — they were best friends and had other things to prioritize. Finding Max and clearing their names was more important.

But he couldn't deny that the giddy, goofy smile on Jensen's lips made his heart seize.

Cougar had missed Jensen's smile, and he was definitely not going to stop believing anytime soon.

 

_5\. Eres Mi Protector_

Cougar didn't often ask himself where Jensen had learned some of the songs he sang. Most often it was obvious that he had heard them on the radio or found them on YouTube, but sometimes — without as much as a warning — he sang something that took Cougar completely by surprise.

Like the time it turned out that Jensen knew several lullabies and soft, heartfelt songs in Spanish. Cougar couldn't say for sure when Jensen had learned them, but he guessed on before they were presumed dead — when he was still talking to Cougar's mother.

Jensen knew the songs she used to sing to Cougar when he was growing up.

The first time Jensen sang one was two nights after Cougar had killed Roque.

That night Cougar startled awake, shaking and breathless from a nightmare he couldn't quite remember, but knew had to be part Roque and part Bolivia. He must have made some kind of sound, loud enough to wake Jensen up, because even if they were sharing a hotel room their beds stood far apart — too far apart for Jensen to have noticed only from Cougar's tossing and turning. Without as much as a word or a second of hesitation Jensen was there, hand light and gentle on Cougar's arm, asking for permission to comfort him.

A part of Cougar wanted to ignore him — to pretend that the nightmare wasn't a big deal — but the concern on Jensen's face always made him relent. Jensen hadn't even stopped long enough to put on his glasses, his hair askew and t-shirt rumpled. Cougar didn't have the heart to throw back the support Jensen wanted to offer, even if it was slightly bittersweet by then, laced with unrequited longing as it was.

Cougar was no fool and denial only got him so far. He was in love with his best friend and touching him, talking to him, and being comforted by him was both soothing and a masochistic kind of torture. But Cougar endured it, because he was still yearning for the closeness — not to mention that it actually _did_ help.

It also seemed to benefit Jensen, to have someone to care for.

That night, when Jensen made room for himself in Cougar's bed — warm and solid where he pressed up against Cougar's side — Cougar couldn't help but wonder if this really was within the realms of your average friendship. But such debates were essentially useless considering that _Jensen_ was anything but average, and anything related to him couldn't be expected to be, either.

Still, Cougar stiffened when Jensen sang the first words of one of his childhood songs, whispered softly against Cougar's hair, right next to his ear. Jensen sang it differently than Cougar's mother, partly because of his pronunciation, but more so because of the tone.

Cougar's mother had been maternal and protective, but Jensen sang the song with a different kind of love — an aching, gentle, and selfless kind, that spoke only of his wish to make Cougar feel better. Jensen wanted to help him and shelter him, at least for a short moment.

That made Cougar feel both better and worse, and as embarrassed as he was by it later, he acted on pure instinct when he turned onto his side and curled up against Jensen. For once in his life he could accept that he was allowed to feel lost and afraid. Jensen wrapped himself around Cougar, never hesitating or stumbling over the words he was singing. Jensen's arms were a comforting weight to have resting against his side, keeping Cougar from drifting away into further nightmares.

And while it took several long minutes for Cougar to fall back asleep it was a minor miracle that he managed at all. He usually wouldn't, not after having woken up with such a start. But with Jensen there, singing softly in his ear while Cougar was wrapped up in the warmth and comforting smell of him, sleep came surprisingly easy.

 

_6\. Lionel Richie – Hello_

Cougar was so used to the background noise of Jensen's singing that he sometimes didn't stop to think _what_ Jensen was singing. Most of the time it was the pop songs he had heard on the radio the day before, or the ones he had listened to when he was younger and suddenly remembered. Neither of those pointed towards some hidden meaning. But sometimes, every now and then, Cougar knew that Jensen would toss in those that had a real message.

Like dedicating a song about friendship to Cougar, or how Jensen switched to Spanish when he noticed that Cougar was feeling particularly down. Cougar couldn't help lingering whenever Jensen sang those, listening with a complex mix of fondness and longing coiling in his chest.

He missed his family.

They were no closer to finding Max and Cougar ached at the thought of what his family had to be going through. He might not have visited all that often when he was still in the military, but at least they had known that he was alive.

At least they hadn't thought that he was a child-murdering traitor.

So while the Spanish songs helped a great deal, they were also a bittersweet reminder of what he had lost. Cougar would rather have them than not, however, and always made sure to either smile in thanks — if a bit sadly — or brush a gentle touch against Jensen's shoulder or arm, just to show that he appreciated the effort.

Jensen always made an effort when it came to Cougar.

Even when it involved making himself unhappy in the process, it turned out. Cougar would never even have found out if he hadn't been able to move silently enough that Jensen didn't hear him approach — and known that Jensen had a habit of baring his heart through his song choices; even more so when he was unaware of having an audience.

As it were, Cougar walked into the room Jensen had claimed as his in their current safe house, to let him know that it was time to eat again — Jensen often needed to be reminded of such things. Cougar found himself freezing just inside the threshold, however. It wasn't the song that did it, not at first, but the sight of Jensen sitting leaned back in his computer chair, slowly thumbing a rosary.

Jensen wasn't particularly religious, first of all. He didn't seem to mind accompanying Cougar or Jess when they went to church on Sundays, but would never think of doing it on his own. So to see Jensen with a rosary was a bit of a surprise, even if Cougar recognized it — he even had an identical one in his own room, tucked away in his duffel.

Cougar's mother had pulled them aside during one of their visits and given them the matching rosaries, together with her blessing. Cougar had been suitably confused the first couple of seconds, followed by absolute mortification when he realized that his mother had done the exact same thing for Isabel and her husband. His mother had clearly gotten it all wrong and was getting way ahead of things by trying to welcome Jensen into the family as Cougar's significant other.

This had been before Cougar had allowed himself to even consider what he felt for Jensen and his mother might, admittedly, have rushed the epiphany somewhat with her actions.

But Cougar couldn't very well protest or give the rosary back in front of Jensen, who had seemed completely unaware of the deeper meaning of said gift. He had been absolutely thrilled — not to mention honored — to be gifted with something from a woman he respected so deeply.

So Cougar had been forced to stay his tongue until he got his mother alone and could explain how he was grateful for her being so considerate and accepting, but really, he and Jensen weren't a couple. She had seemed both surprised and disappointed, but had replied that they might as well keep the rosaries. Asking Jensen to hand it back would surely only make him think he had done something wrong, which he hadn't.

It had been an awkward affair and Cougar was secretly grateful that Jensen had never worn or carried his rosary around — not that Cougar had seen, anyway. He had honestly thought that Jensen had stored it with his other trinkets at their house on base, and that it had been lost once they had gone into hiding.

That was obviously not the case.

Jensen must have had the rosary on him — or amongst his equipment — during the Bolivia mission. That was the only way for him to still have it in his possession. So maybe Jensen had an idea of the significance of the rosary after all, or at least valued it highly enough to want to keep it close.

The thought made a heavy lump of both longing and fondness grow in Cougar's chest.

And there Jensen was, singing softly to himself with his eyes focused on the rosary's smooth beads, for once looking absolutely calm — and the more heartbreaking for it. The song wasn't even one that Cougar particularly liked — he found the lyrics silly — but the way Jensen sang them made them take on a whole new meaning. Perhaps it was the aching, trembling quality to his voice, breathless and close to breaking, or maybe it was the look in his eyes.

Jensen sang the songs as if he knew exactly what it felt like; as if the words were shaking him to his very core. Like he wanted nothing more than to be able to tell this person that he loved them.

Now, Cougar didn't have a habit of being presumptuous, but he was no fool, either. To have Jensen sit there in the dark, illuminated only by the glowing screen from his laptop, and sing forlornly about unrequited love while thumbing one of the matching rosaries Cougar's mother had given them — as a sign of their relationship, however misinterpreted it had been — well, it didn't take a genius to figure out what that meant.

Not when Jensen looked like he was breaking. Not when there was so much pain and longing in his voice. Not when Cougar could feel his heart clench and recognize himself in the lyrics, just as easily as Jensen seemed to.

Jensen didn't notice Cougar until he had walked across the room as was close enough to reach out and wrap his hand around Jensen's fingers and the rosary he was holding. Jensen jumped in surprise, the song cutting off abruptly, and when he stared up at Cougar he looked absolutely terrified. Bare, vulnerable, and so incredibly afraid, because there was no mistaking what that song had been about. Both of them knew that Cougar was far too perceptive to have missed it.

Jensen opened his mouth — probably to apologize — and Cougar didn't have the heart to let him, because he knew that Jensen had it all wrong. Jensen looked like he thought that Cougar would be angry with him, or maybe even disgusted, to hear that Jensen was in love with him. In reality it was everything Cougar could possibly want. So he didn't want was to hear Jensen explain his reasons or belittle himself by apologizing, because he would try to distance himself from Cougar with the same breath.

Cougar couldn't stand it when Jensen tried to shy away from him, no matter the reason.

So when Jensen tried to speak Cougar hushed him, raising his other hand to let it run through Jensen's hair, the gesture unmistakably gentle. The touch made Jensen stiffen, either from surprise or confusion — possibly both. He didn't say anything, instead looking up at Cougar in silence, his eyes wide and almost glowing in the bright light from his laptop. He looked so innocent and frail in that moment that the only thing Cougar could think of doing was to wrap his arms around Jensen's shoulders and pull him closer.

It only took a fraction of a second for Jensen to react, making him bury his face against Cougar's chest with a choked little sound and slip his arms around Cougar's waist. He held on with a kind of desperation that made Cougar's heart ache and his fingers ran through Jensen's hair, trying to soothe as best as he could. The position was a bit awkward since Jensen hadn't had time to turn his chair before Cougar decided to hug him and the armrest was in the way, but they could make do.

Cougar took a deep breath before leaning down to press a kiss against the top of Jensen's head. He could feel Jensen shiver at the contact. Cougar closed his eyes, reveling in the closeness.

His voice was soft — echoing in the peaceful stillness in the room — when he whispered that he loved Jensen too, more than he could ever imagine.

The arms around his middle squeezed tighter.

 

_7\. Joe Cocker – You Can Leave Your Hat On_

Being in an actual relationship with Jensen was surprisingly easy, mainly because few things changed. Fact was, most things were exactly the same, except where they slept and the amount of sex they had. In every other aspect they had been acting like a couple for years, so yeah, maybe Cougar's mother had been on to something when giving them those rosaries.

Either way, they took to sharing beds rather than just rooms and the news were met with a sense of 'fucking finally' rather than surprise from the others. As was so sufficiently demonstrated by the fifty dollar bill a grumbling Aisha handed over to a widely grinning Pooch.

Cougar refused to ask about it.

He was happy, though, despite the fact that they were presumed dead and he couldn't talk to his family. He would undoubtedly become even happier when they finally stopped Max — if it would ever come to that — but being able to love Jensen freely and openly until then was definitely something he cherished.

Jensen seemed to be in full agreement.

He was bouncier and more affectionate than usual — which was no easy feat — and completely ignored any and all attempts to make him calm down, unless they came from Cougar. That was nothing new, on the other hand. Cougar had always had more sway over Jensen than all of the others combined, and now Cougar had new means with which to gain Jensen's attention.

Kisses _always_ worked.

They could shut him up, make him settle down, and — with some work — convince him to do those things he usually forgot about doing, like eat and sleep. Jensen was _never_ too busy to want another kiss from Cougar. Which meant that Jensen was often seen trailing after Cougar with a hopeful look on his face, kind of like a faithful puppy, being lead towards food or a bed if need be.

Pooch made one or two jokes about getting Jensen a leash and collar to match, to which Jensen replied that he certainly wouldn't mind since he was always up for spicing up his sex life. That seemed to give Pooch mental images he'd rather not have and he never spoke of it again.

Jensen's deceptively innocent expression showed that he had expected nothing less.

Not to mention that there was absolutely nothing wrong with their sex life. Fact was, the people in their immediate surrounding seemed to find it to be a bit _too_ good. Both Cougar and Jensen craved the intimacy — possibly more than they wanted the sex itself — so they had a tendency to engage in less than innocent activities on a frequent basis, and with a slightly lacking consideration for their location from time to time.

Although Cougar blamed the latter on Jensen, since he was the impatient one who couldn't wait until their found a room to lock themselves into.

Well, except maybe that one time when Cougar walked into the kitchen of their newest safe house and found Jensen singing along to the song that was playing on the tinny, ancient radio. That in itself wasn't unusual, but the fact that Jensen was singing about a slow striptease while _dancing_ as if he was performing the very same thing — although without actually removing any of his clothes — did cause Cougar's brain to go haywire.

But he felt he couldn't be blamed for that.

Jensen was gorgeous, first of all, and the thing was that when Jensen was unaware of having an audience he moved with a completely different grace than he did while being observed. It was smoother, more relaxed and, unsurprisingly, more eye-catching, because he wasn't _trying_ to be noticed. That was usually Jensen's problem: he tried too hard and ended up looking like a dork. But when he stood alone in the kitchen — loose and confident — his movements were undeniably sensual.

Cougar couldn't help staring.

He traced the slope of Jensen's shoulders, following the line of his back, down to his swaying hips — all while Jensen moved to the music and the desire flared brighter in Cougar's gut.

Who _wouldn't_ bend Jensen over the nearest surface after having witnessed something like that?

Cougar was definitely not strong enough to resist and Jensen seemed just as eager, when he got over the surprise of suddenly having Cougar walk up to him and kiss him like he had never tasted him before. The fact that they were in the kitchen didn't register with either of them.

But Cougar's hat _did_ stay on the entire time.

 

_8\. Bette Midler – The Wind Beneath My Wings_

What Cougar treasured the most in his relationship with Jensen was the closeness. With it came all the other things that he valued and craved: the trust, the intimacy, the security, and the knowledge that Jensen always wanted what was best for Cougar. People might think that Cougar was the considerate one of the two, but the fact was that Jensen's loyalty — unconditional and sincere as it was — would make him do anything for the people he cared about.

On some days, it was actually rather terrifying to know what kind of power Cougar held over Jensen. Then again, Jensen had the exact same kind of sway over Cougar. It was a mutual exchange, as most other things in their relationship.

It was a common misconception that Cougar had to put up with Jensen and his antics, when in reality he embraced them. They were what made Jensen unique and there wasn't a single part of him that Cougar wanted to change. Sure, even he lost his patience sometimes — he wasn't infallible and Jensen could be excruciatingly annoying — but there was a difference between that and wanting to reshape who Jensen was.

Cougar didn't. Cougar wanted Jensen just the way he was and he would punch anyone who suggested otherwise.

Jensen was perfect. Jensen was beautiful. Jensen was _his_.

And he was Jensen's.

What more could Cougar possibly ask for?

People were clearly idiots if they thought that Cougar was somehow settling for Jensen. On most days Cougar was pretty certain that it was the other way around, since he had never met a person more lovable or loving than Jensen. As flaky and weird as he was, Jensen took being genuine and sweet to a whole new level.

It was usually the little things — those that passed most people by. Like how Jensen would instinctively know when it was okay to talk and when it wasn't, despite him coming off as clueless at first glance. Or how he always knew how to distract Cougar from his occasionally grim thoughts, always smiling and supportive when Cougar needed it the most. Or simply for how unconditionally he loved Cougar and probably always would.

Cougar was lucky to have Jensen, and he wasn't stupid enough not to realize that Jensen considered himself lucky to have Cougar in return. They had each other, and that was what made it so great.

They might not have managed to stop Max yet — Cougar was beginning to fear they never would — but lying there in bed with Jensen, snuggled up next to him, wasn't all that bad. Jensen was singing some cheesy Bette Midler song under his breath, voice soft and careful, but Cougar didn't mind. Not when Jensen kept drawing random patterns on whatever piece of Cougar's skin he could comfortably reach, his fingertips curious and gentle in their exploration. Or that he gave Cougar dopey, blissful smiles in between the whispered words.

Cougar knew the song had meaning — that it was one of those times when the lyrics mattered. And while he felt a definite urge to snort at Jensen's sentimentality, Cougar couldn't deny that the look on Jensen's face also made his chest clench from fondness. Jensen being goofy didn't necessarily mean he couldn't be adorable at the same time.

So Cougar gave him an indulgent smile and angled his head to give Jensen a kiss. It might have put an end to Jensen's singing, but neither of them seemed to mind. He would probably pick up again once the kiss ended.

 

**Author's Note:**

> This somehow ended up being a 6k one shot without a single line of spoken dialogue. I'm not sure if that's an accomplishment or just weird.
> 
> [CarpeDentum](http://archiveofourown.org/users/CarpeDentum) betaed but I have made changes since then so any mistakes are mine.


End file.
